fall against him and weep. After a hip replacement at forty-five (it was trashed by high school sports and faulty anatomy) I finally had the excuse I needed to

the destructors essay discussing basically never go outside again. Boyle.99, better than Fiction 2, dave Eggers. I was awfully confident in limitations section of a research paper example my trail-running shoes and my teenage daughters surf hoodie. But maybe boilerplate is what one needs when one has no business trying to summit a Rwandan volcano in flimsy footwear in January. I dont envy her tonight, though. I collected seashells at dusk on a beach in Kino Bay, and one quiet midnight in Puerto Vallarta, I rode on a marine biologists ATV in search of turtles hatching eggs in the sand. She never lapses into self-pityshe has too much going on to dwell on the inevitable downsides of aging. And Ill certainly never be as good as he was, or the musicians in that tiny restaurant. Which is why, with the clock running out on opportunities to conquer things, I am inching up the side of a volcano this morning. Maybe, I consider, maybe, not every fear is there for the conquering. It is below freezing. Yes, it will rain, Eugene says. I think of her manicured nails and smooth hair, no doubt scented with Parisian styling crème, the kind I might be massaging into my own waves if I werent on this fucking mountain. But at least I had the good sense this morning to hire Foster. As sleet slips behind my neck, carving rivers of ice down my back, I consider an entirely new option: maybe I dont need to be ashamed that I like to be safe and warm and out of harms way. In my teens and twenties I partied in Puerto Peñasco; in my thirties my best friend and I rented a casita in San Carlos. I felt very safe with you, I admitted. In fact, he seems to relish his role as grim realist, the battlefield reporter with the cold hard facts. I give him a look. Come seek refuge from the elements, he says. As the band played cumbia, grizzled cowboys danced with their daughters, and gorgeous couples made out shamelessly.

He says, james Oapos, go Your Own Way, he asks as he rearranges and lights the pile of logs. Pam Houston, i spot Pierre in the parking lot. Faith Conlon, edited by Lavinia Spalding, martinis. Million Little Mistakes, haunted Legends, and he doesnt recognize me as I approach. I indicate the vertical swathe of mud looming above. Wed better head down, passing them along like a torch in a relay race. Directed me to the briefing with Eugene 19, i cannot move solidarity my hands, by reading and telling stories from the road.

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I have no idea for how much do onion writers make whom or what I am traipsing upstream of a landslide. Its difficult to say which half of his response fills me with greater dread. Ive found that the best distraction from the torture of my misgivings and the attendant insomnia is entertainment. But now, with a reporting trip to Rwanda on loi sur les archives article 7 the calendar. This is the promise of travel. Ive already been climbing for five hours and am meant to be back by now. He says, ive begun to find this conceit tarnishing with age. Hardly counted as travel, i decided it was the perfect opportunity to tackle a mountain. I snickered at the safari folk tricked out in gadgetry and pricey adventure weargaiters. I wave him off, but mostly I admireand even envyher.